My Dad

Today is my Dad's lunar birthday.. We had our tradition mian xian, red egg and creamy cake for lunch...As usual, Dad being the birthday boy did the cooking. He always cook when I go back home for meals..and he always cook for me first. Even our little cousin who came over to stay were placed third in the list after me and lucien. The ranking do matter in a way cos I feel that Dad has placed me as one of the "important person list" after so many years of misgivings that he favored my bro and we always quarrel about it. We reconciled only after I moved out of the house. Absence makes the heart grows fonder and that really applies to us.

We have in fact celebrated his birthday on Friday over at "zhi char". And it was over dinner when we were placing order of "our(Bro and I)" favorite foods and Dad mentioned that he can't eat broccoli and I was surprised. He then mentioned that he had pasted "it" on the wall..My Dad has thus habit of communicating things to us by cutting articles that he feel that we need to know and paste on the wall. I used to frown at his "eccentric" ideas when I was younger and anything that he pasted, I will voice out my opinions and rebuke.

After the sumptuous lunch, I walked to the "notice board" and took a look at the "announcement".
The subject reads "Diet for Gout Patients".
Eat as much as you can:
Milk, Egg, Most vegetables, Most fruits, Bread, Butter or Margarine, Cheese, White Meat

Restrict your intake:
Asparagus, Cauliflower, Lettuce, Mushroom, Oat Meal, Whole Wheat Cereal, Red Meat

Abstain Completely...
and a whole list of food.... And Dad loves the food here on the restriction and abstain list.. I was so upset and started to have migraine as I wrote down the list...He can't even have Carrot, Spinach, Beancurd, Tomato and even Tomato Sauce. Can you imagine how bad it is?
At first I have no idea what "Gout" mean but as far as I know, it is not something that I should treat it lightly.

On our way back home I couldn't help crying.

I couldn't help crying again when I took the shower. How I regret all those nasty things I have said to him...And to think I have never write an essay about him before back in school. I have wrote about my Mum my Grandfather but never him.
I used to scream at him, telling him how "I hate him"..
I was so rebellious so willful but then. Everyday were like living in battlefield and back then, but I always feel that I have won the battles one way or in another by saying any thing that I can provoke or make him upset.

I blamed him for my childhood, for mum, for grandfather and the "stupid chili punishment" when I rebuked him..

But again if not for his persistence, I may have not have lived. When I was 5-6 years old, I did something stupid to myself and forg0t about it. Obviously I was too scare to remember and it sometime bring chills to me, it was a classic story that I shared with friends. My Dad discovered that I was not breathing properly when he hugged me one day. I remembered that was when I was primary 1. So almost 2 years of "that thing " living in my body. If not for his persistence and seeking the doctor again and again, I will have "that thing" with me for rest of my life. He keeps the bottle that the doctor gave him and told me that he will show it to the grandchildren when I am older... I wonder where is the bottle now, probably some in that safe.

He can be very eccentric at times. Not that he is always right. As I age with him, I can now comprehend with him what his thought process is. And the problem he is, he thinks and reads too much but whatever he does, his intention is for this family...

God makes him my Dad for a reason. He is the only father that I have for this lifetime and how many X of 30 years can we spend together? I can't undo all those things I have said in the past, the only thing I can is NOT to repeat now and in future. And pray that God will make him well again...

I feel so sad to see how he had aged so much with all the white hairs and how much weight he had lost...

Even so he is still my handsome Dad(everyone used to praise him how good he looks.)

Sunny is my Dad.